Looking out/looking in [Book] / Ronald B Adler; Russell F Proctor; Neil Towne.

Includes bibliographical references & index.

1. A first look at interpersonal relationships -- Why we communicate -- Physical needs -- Identity needs -- Social needs -- Practical goals -- The process of communication -- A linear view -- A transactional view -- Communication principles and misconceptions -- Communication principles -- Communication misconceptions -- The nature of interpersonal communication -- Two views of interpersonal communication -- Technology and interpersonal communication -- Personal and impersonal communication : a matter of balance -- Communicating about relationships -- Content and relational messages -- Types of relational messages -- Metacommunication -- What makes an effective communicator? -- Communication competence defined -- Characteristics of competent communicators -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- pt. I. Looking in -- 2. Communication and identity : the self and messages -- Communication and the self-concept -- Biological and social roots of the self -- Characteristics of the self-concept -- Influences on identity -- The self-fulfilling prophecy and communication -- Changing your self-concept -- Presenting the self : communication as identity management -- Public and private selves -- Characteristics of identity management -- Why manage identities? -- How do we manage identities? -- Identity management and honesty -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 3. Perception : what you see is what you get -- The perception process -- Selection -- Organization -- Interpretation -- Negotiation -- Influences on perception -- Physiological influences -- Cultural differences -- Social roles -- Self-concept -- Common tendencies in perception -- We judge ourselves more charitably than others -- We pay more attention to others' negative characteristics -- We are influenced by the obvious -- We cling to first impressions -- We assume that others are similar to us -- Perception checking -- Elements of perception checking -- Perception checking considerations -- Empathy and communication -- Empathy defined -- The pillow method : a tool for building empathy -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 4. Emotions : thinking, feeling, and communicating -- What are emotions? -- Physiological factors -- Nonverbal reactions -- Cognitive interpretations -- Verbal expression -- Types of emotions -- Primary and mixed emotions -- Intense and mild emotions -- Influences on emotional expression -- Personality -- Culture -- Gender -- Social conventions -- Fear of self-disclosure -- Emotional contagion -- Guidelines for expressing emotions -- Recognized your feelings -- Expand your emotional vocabulary -- Share multiple feelings -- Recognize the difference between feeling, talking, and acting -- Accept responsibility for your feelings -- Consider when and where to express your feelings -- Managing difficult emotions -- Facilitative and debilitative emotions -- Sources of debilitative emotions -- Irrational thinking and debilitative emotions -- Minimizing debilitative emotions -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- pt. II. Looking out -- 5. Language : barrier and bridge -- Language is symbolic -- Understandings and misunderstandings -- Understanding words : semantic rules -- Understanding structure : syntactic rules -- Understanding context : pragmatic rules -- The impact of language -- Naming and identity -- Affiliation, attraction, and interest -- Power -- Disruptive language -- The language of responsibility -- Gender and language -- Content -- Reasons for communicating -- Conversational style -- Nongender variables -- Language and culture -- Verbal communication styles -- Language and worldview -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 6. Nonverbal communication : messages beyond words -- Characteristics of nonverbal communication -- Nonverbal skills are important -- All behavior has communicative value -- Nonverbal communication is primarily relational -- Nonverbal communication serves many functions -- Nonverbal communication is ambiguous -- Influences on nonverbal communication -- Gender -- Culture -- Types of nonverbal communication -- Body orientation -- Posture -- Gestures -- Face and eyes -- Voice -- Touch -- Physical attractiveness -- Clothing -- Distance -- Territoriality -- Physical environment -- Time -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 7. Listening : more than meets the ear -- Elements in the listening process -- Hearing -- Attending -- Understanding -- Responding -- Remembering -- The challenge of listening -- Types of ineffective listening -- Why we don't listen better -- Meeting the challenge of listening better -- Types of listening responses -- Prompting -- Questioning -- Paraphrasing -- Supporting -- Analyzing -- Advising -- Judging -- Choosing the best listening response -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- pt. III. Looking at relational dynamics -- 8. Communication and relational dynamics -- Why we form relationships -- Attraction -- Intimacy -- Rewards -- Models of relational development and maintenance -- Developmental models -- Dialectical perspectives -- Characteristics of relational development and maintenance -- Self-disclosure in relationships -- Degrees of self-disclosure -- A model of self-disclosure -- Reasons for self-disclosure -- Guidelines for self-disclosure -- Alternatives to self-disclosure -- Lying -- Equivocating -- Hinting -- The ethics of evasion -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 9. Improving communication climates -- Communication climate : the key to positive relationships -- Confirming and disconfirming communication -- How communication climates develop -- Defensiveness : causes and remedies -- Types of defensive reactions -- Preventing defensiveness in others -- Saving face : the clear message format -- Behavior -- Interpretation -- Feeling -- Consequence -- Intention -- Using the clear message format -- Responding nondefensively to criticism -- Seek more information -- Agree with the critic -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- 10. Managing interpersonal conflicts -- The nature of conflict -- Conflict defined -- Conflict is natural -- Conflict can be beneficial -- Personal conflict styles -- Nonassertive behavior -- Direct aggression -- Passive aggression -- Indirect communication -- Assertion -- Which style is best? -- Conflict in relational systems -- Complementary, symmetrical, and parallel styles -- Intimate and aggressive styles -- Conflict rituals -- Variables in conflict styles -- Gender -- Culture -- Methods of conflict resolution -- Win-lose -- Lose-lose -- Compromise -- Win-win -- Win-win communication skills -- Step 1, identify your problem and unmet needs -- Step 2, make a date -- Step 3, describe your problem and needs -- Step 4, consider your partner's point of view -- Step 5, negotiate a solution -- Step 6, follow up the solution -- Constructive conflict : questions and answers -- Isn't the win-win approach too good to be true? -- Isn't the win-win approach too elaborate? -- Isn't win-win negotiating too rational? -- Is it possible to change others? -- Summary -- Key terms -- Media resources -- Endnotes -- Glossary -- Name index -- Subject index -- Photo credits -- Literary credits.

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